June 28

2 Samuel 13:14–15 (NIV84)
14 But he refused to listen to her, and since he was stronger than she, he raped her.
15 Then Amnon hated her with intense hatred. In fact, he hated her more than he had loved her. Amnon said to her, “Get up and get out!”

So Amnon lusted after his half-sister Tamar. He had watched Tamar and thought about touching her so much that he looked bedraggled! He had such an intense desire to have sex with her that a plan was devised to get what he wanted. As you have read the account you will notice that Tamar was not opposed to Amnon having sex with her, but she wanted to do it under a marriage covenant and not in a wicked way, but Amnon, who had waited and lusted and plotted couldn’t wait! He had to get what he wanted and take it he did. Here is the interesting point: After he got what he wanted, after he had sex with Tamar, he hated Tamar! That is kinda’ kooky isn’t it? Isn’t that what he wanted?

As it turned out with Amnon it turns out with all of us. When we go outside of God’s provision to satisfy our longings, we hate ----- ourselves! Yes Amnon hated Tamar, but really he hated himself and he focused that hatred on Tamar. The same thing happens to us! When we do things that we know are evil to satiate ourselves, after we do it we are sickened by our sin. Oftentimes we turn this hatred on ourselves in the form of abuse. We abuse food, we spend ourselves into oblivion, we drink ourselves silly, we torpedo our success because we have come to believe that we are despicable. Give this some thought for a moment.

Learning this will help us not to go forward with our evil desires, however we may not stop ourselves from our indulgence. How do you get yourself out of the self-hatred? Receive God’s forgiveness and love. It is simple, yet difficult to do, I know. The blood of Christ is supposed to cleanse us from a guilty conscious so we can be free to LIVE righteous! People, we have to be cleansed! The problem with most people who have addictions and destructive behavior of all kinds is that they are acting out who they think they are and giving themselves what they deserve! This ought not to be so for a King’s Kid! Come to the King and be cleansed! Let Him point out your sin so He can cleanse you from it, and then and only then, can you begin to experience His love and mercy so you can stop killing yourself over and over again.